Hey Time magazine
Hey Time Magazine,
I know you were just trying to sell copies of your magazine, but in response to the question posed here: http://www.time.com/time/
My experiences looked a little different than the image you put on your cover- I don’t have the body of a 26-year-old anymore, and nursing my toddler only involved a chair, if it was for me to put my fanny in. But you know what, Jamie Lynne Grumet is definitely mom enough. And so am I. If you’re reading this, I bet you are, too.
You see, I really believe that regardless of how much the media tries to sell us on The Mommy Wars, deep down, I think it’s all just a way to undermine our self-confidence. But you know what? You are mom enough! You are the perfect mom for your child. I don’t need a magazine to tell me which parenting style is best for my family or to try to guilt me about whether I did or didn’t breastfeed. Or co-sleep. Or stay home. Or paint my kid’s face blue. Not that these things aren’t important- they certainly are, and I have my opinions on parenting styles and face paint colors, of course.
Unfortunately, I think too many of us buy in to this myth that there is some perfect mom out there somewhere- the mom that we should be. Sure, I aspire to magically turn into the perfect mom- who holds down a full-time job, cooks a homemade meal every night, keeps the house clean, makes sure the kids brush their teeth, reads them the requisite stories before bed, gets them to bed at 8 p.m. on the dot where they magically stay until 8 a.m., so that Magical Mom has enough time to perfect her needlework and take a 15-minute shower in the morning without interruption. I haven’t met that mom yet. On a good day, I might accomplish three of those things. And I admit, I’m not sure whether I should be proud or embarrassed.
That’s the point where this media myth starts to swirl into my subconscious and make me feel like a terrible mom. But you know what? I’m not. I don’t think most of us are, barring the obvious abuse and neglect. You know what doesn’t constitute neglect? Forgetting to read the kids books every night! Or deciding not to breastfeed a toddler. It’s ok to give birth in a hospital, or at home, or to not give birth at all! Regardless of whether you adopt or get an epidural or schedule a c-section; vaccinate or go to a pox party- whatever choices you make, as long as they are the right choices for you and your family, they are the right choices. Hang in there, mamas!
Remember, you are mom enough. You are!